Yangjuan Hu – Embarrassing but Real

There were two things that impressed me when I searched my name online: One is how embarrassing it is while the other is how authentic it is! If I were amnesia, I might really be able to find myself back by searching my name.

The first thing I found by googling my name in Chinese is an interview of me on a campus magazine. It was published four years ago. It said I was the leader of the debate team of Journalism and Communication School, Renmin University of China. It seemed that I was quite passionate about debate and I loved movies, reading and animation. It even published pictures of me. It helped me make sure that it was me rather than other people with the same name. But I have to say that girl in the picture seems very stupid for me now and that’s the most embarrassing part! But there was already enough information to find myself back. I know my university, my hobbies and I can speculate my age from it.

The second result was a Renren (Chinese  website similar to Facebook; Chinese government has blocked Facebook access) page under my name.  It had been blocked and I couldn’t make sure if it was me or someone else with the same name. What I could see were just two avatars which were obviously not me. One is an actress making a grimace and the other one is an animation character making grimace. So I must be someone who love grimace if it were me. Actually it is. One thing that surprised me is that I can still find this page now though I DELETED all my data three years ago and blocked the account since I decided to quit. It proved again what we covered in class today that all the DELETE thing is just ILLUSION.

I also found two videos which I made in university. The name of the  account showed that it was used by a class to upload all the assignments of the students. Then I could find out names of my classmates and who I had been working with.  It’s just like this blog which we are writing now. It might also be useful if I really got amnesia one day!

There was also an account under my name on a Chinese forum called “To Know”. It’s a very rational forum where people can ask and answer any kind of question, and ‘like’ good answers on their opinion. Answers will be ranked by the ‘like’ they got. From the data of the account, I know that it followed topics like tennis, Japanese music, Japanese movie, Japanese drama and Japanese animation! So I must be a big fan of Japanese culture, which is true, AGAIN!

I’ve also found two papers written by me published on academic journals. One on advertising and the other on history of journalism. That’s quite confusing for making sure what is my study interest. It’s a real situation again because actually I am confusing now even though I always pretended to be sure when I told other people about it. It’s interesting that the traces  I left online could even REFLECT ME MORE AUTHENTICALLY than what I do in real life!

 

Published by deuzemedialife

Mediastudies, University of Amsterdam

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