You might say that loving media is vain. Loving media just removes the love you could give in real life situations. Loving media is a waste of time. I might have thought this once but not now. Not ever again. Especially not after experiencing loss of someone that had gone before their time.
My friend was 17 and so was I. As of now almost 3 years have passed and I have entered my 20s in a country far away from where we met. Far away from where our friendship blossomed and ended before it truly began. Far away from any place that could trigger a series of happy and nostalgic memories.
It seems that now more than ever the only way I can remind myself of times long gone is the media my friend left behind. Their undeleted Instagram profile opens up to show pictures from adventures we had together, their captions remind me of inside jokes we shared. When feeling lonely with a few clicks I open up my messages and see our chats, the ridiculous memes they shared, the school work they copied from me, the sweet messages we exchanged, the music my friend shared with me. I still see their Spotify, all of the playlists made, those they passionately told me about. One of them I like to think was possibly made for me or at least influenced by me. But the chance to tell me about it never came.
Although the pain has passed, my heart still bears a hole in a shape of a friend that can never be replaced. That’s why I have media. That’s why I love media.
Media has a power to remind me of memories and feelings that sometimes seem forgotten but that never truly are.